Not only did my six year old son lose his first tooth this week, his heart was broken for what I fear to be the first of many heart breaks. More than the number of teeth in his sweet little mouth this little chick magnet son of mine has had the women lining up since he could open those big brown eyes. But this is the first time he felt like his world just dropped into a big hole, all over a girl.
Mama, you know what happened today? N stole my love from A.R.. He took it mama. He took my love from her and says it’s his.
Did I mention he is six?
Tempted to sing to him, Love Stinks by The J. Geils Band, I hugged him hard. Kissed his soft lips and handed him a string cheese.
A.R. moved in down the street recently and is in his kindergarten class. She has big brown eyes like my son, a sweet smile and honey skin. She wears cool flowered pants and what I believe might be the deal breaker – owns her very own drum set. While my son sits behind the drums, tapping out his rhythm she dances in front singing her own tune. They make quite the duo.
Remember those first crushes? The way your stomach flipped when that special someone walked in the room?
I ran into the mother of my first crush this summer in the Nordstrom bathroom and introduced my daughter to her as, “The mother of my first love.” I was four.
So the apple has fallen.
My son has fallen for strangers at the park, high school aged babysitters, his older sister’s friends but this girl is his age, his class mate, the girl down the street – someone more reachable than the girl ten years older or on the movie screen.
I am recording this for him in his journal – the one I will give him when he’s 18 and graduating from high school. Just in case he forgets the girl who made his blood race thinking another boy had stolen her heart. It will only take a few words to remember, to bring it all back like yesterday.
I record it in my journal too so I remember not that my boy had his heart broken but that he touched mine and opened it up to a wider place.
For that’s what my son does to me, similar to a crush but lasting. He taps into my heart, sees the world for all its beauty and gets hurt by the dark not so fun parts.
He bounces back though. A.R. is coming over for a play date tomorrow and you know I will be keeping all the doors open, listening in on those priceless moments, savoring their innocence. And biting my lip holding it all in.
by J.G. McGlothern