At the risk of sounding sexist, I will say many women drivers, at least here in Seattle, drive like everyone else should just get out of their way.
Merging into traffic, a simple concept, takes on a whole “I-was-here-first, I’m-in-more-of-a-hurry-than-you, it-should-be-my-turn” event. “I-had-a-rougher-morning-than-you, my-car-is-bigger, here-I-come, even-though-it’s-not-my-turn” attitudes are prevalent on the road these days. One must drive, like my dad taught me, defensively to stay safe.
Do we take out our feelings of self worth, lack of confidence and insecurities behind the wheel?
Catching up with a high school friend the other night our conversation took on the theme of entitlement. She is a grade school teacher at a private school and had a hellish day. With everything she was sharing you could tell she had faced a lot of parents who expected her, the teacher, to not only teach their children, but to raise them.
Yes, they have the attitude of we pay a lot of money for private school, we can just step out of the way and let the teacher do it all, she shared with me.
Private or public schooling, parents still need to be 100% involved in the education of their students. Not doing their work for them, but instead, keeping them accountable. Teaching them responsibility at home first. Paying more money doesn’t entitle you to forfeit your role and this was her experience over the past couple of decades. Of course not with every student, but a handful every year.
Get out of the way, I was here first. You figure it out, I paid good money.
This entitlement hangs in the air like a polluted fog and leaves me worried. I too can feed this energy with my own behavior. It’s easy to pick up my kids shoes, make their beds and wipe up their crumbs. If I don’t teach them to be responsible for their own footprints they could come to expect it.
I caught this behavior in myself today. Totally tired and in need of a pick me up I thought, I deserve to stop at Starbucks and buy myself a cup of coffee. We talk ourselves into this deserving thing and although on one hand it might be true, on the other it’s not even near the truth. When I walk around with this attitude that is when I find myself being rude to strangers and forgetting all about kindness.
Kindness to yourself has to start with kindness to others. At the risk of sounding arrogant I will say that is something we all should be entitled to…entitled to give, before we even think about receiving.
by J.G. McGlothern