One of the aspects of Advent (the liturgical four weeks before Christmas) that I like is that we are in this period of waiting and expectation before Christmas. It is a time to reflect, pause, slow down. Many of us forget that slowing down part because there is so much to “do” that we just don’t have time to “be”, right?
There is a joke around our house about us not owning a dishwasher. Husband likes to say, We don’t have A dishwasher, we have two. This weekend after a dinner party there were lots of dishes. And because when I cook I don’t know how to cook small, there were lots of pots and pans and because when we have friends over we like to stay lubricated, there were lots of glasses.
After SNL hubby was going to wash the dishes. I was fine waiting until morning but I was thrilled he was going to do it, I was just too damn tired to care. When I woke up at 2 am, no hubby in bed, I wandered into the kitchen, lots of dirty dishes but no hubby. He had fallen asleep on the couch. So sorry, honey, he told me. I will get to them in the morning, didn’t mean to fall asleep.
He is reliable in the dish department so I didn’t worry. Yet.
After being gone all day Sunday doing fun family things, guess what was still on the counter when we got home? Yep, dirty dishes. Guess who did not do them? ME.
Normal me would have gotten all huffy and would have started washing the dishes. Instead I crawled in to bed with a book while hubby stayed up late to get some work done. But I did think in my head, Crap, he usually does the party dishes and always covers the weekend kitchen clean-up, I guess this time I will have to finish them. Not how I want to start my Monday.
This morning, the dishes were still there. Pans now from Sunday breakfast, too. I realized I could wait no longer, it was time. I rolled up my sleeves and began filling the sink with hot sudsy water. On dish two, hubby, who normally is out the door for work at this time, comes into the kitchen and says, I got this.
Normal me would’ve gotten all territorial and told him it’s okay, that I had them covered. Instead I started making lunches and cooking breakfast. I thanked him. And side by side we faced Monday. He doing the party dishes and me letting him.
Sure I had to live in the mess a bit. Sure it helped that we were gone most of the day Sunday. But this is life. It’s not perfectly cleaned up and IF WE ARE WILLING to surrender and receive, not always be in control of the outcome we will discover great gifts along the way.
It is when we stop thinking things aren’t working out as we plan and instead step back, be patient and wait, that we see the everyday miracles happening all over the place.
by J.G. McGlothern